


The Gift

by kissing_koffins



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2019-05-08 17:32:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 17,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14699004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kissing_koffins/pseuds/kissing_koffins
Summary: Wren wakes up in an unrecognizable world, only to be captured and presented to a certain god of mischief as a gift by the Grand Master.





	1. Welcome to Sicar

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing so we will see how it goes!  
> I own no characters except Wren, all credit to Marvel for the rest

How I got here isn’t exactly clear: a bright light, a loud bang, then pain. Goddamn the pain. I remember the moment that my sister hit me with the Subaru when learning to drive and getting a broken femur as a result, thinking, _this is the most pain I could ever imagine_. I was wrong. It was as if every bone in my body had been pummeled by a semi going sixty miles an hour.

  
The place in which I landed was familiar, yet so strange. I had grown up with an uncle who ran a junkyard and my first reaction was that I was back there, somehow transported a few hundred miles to that old, backwoods town. The fear set in when I realized that the machine next to me was entirely foreign, not just to me but to my planet. Nothing like it had existed on earth, even Elon Musk was years from even imagining it.

  
I knew I had a concussion; the fuzziness, nausea, and pain indicated as such. _Was this all just because of that, like, Is this some hallucination? Am I dreaming? Am I dead?_

  
The effort I was expending started taking a toll on my brain, and I felt myself fading.

  
The next image I got was of a bright room, too bright for my eyes to focus on anything or anyone making the voices I heard so strange and disembodied.

  
“What’s this?” the voice was gruff, but female.

  
“A gift. Something he hasn’t seen before.” This voice was male, some odd accent foreign to me.

  
“I highly doubt that, but I will let him know. Stay there.”

  
I tried to cry out, ask them not to leave me. _I’m going to die. I don’t even know where I am, but I am going to die here. Alone._ I felt it coming back, the blackness, and I was helpless to stop it.

  
The next time I awoke, the room was just as bright but I could handle it now. It probably had something to do with the mental helmet strapped to my head. I attempted to sit up, but realized I was paralyzed, completely unable to move anything except for my eyes. _What the actual Fuck is going on?_

  
“You can relax, it is just a nerve agent. You aren’t permanently paralyzed.” A tall being with light pink skin and rounded furry ears came into my line of sight. _Now who is this Pink Panther looking mother fucker?_ “Its momentary, just something to keep any damages from accruing. You came in with a pretty bad concussion, wasn’t sure if it could be reversed. You are a lot tougher than you look, Terran.”

  
_Terran? What the fuck is a Terran?_ I tried moving again, causing the screens to blink and beep and he must have noticed because he chuckled.

  
“You’ll be kept here for a few days to observe your recovery, then the Grand Master will decide what to do with you.” Mr. Pink Panther left then, shutting the main light off leaving me in near darkness save for the two machines I was hooked up to. I tried to figure out what exactly it was that they were monitoring, but they had strange symbols rather than words.

  
I was visited three times a day the next four days, sometimes by Mr. Pink Panther alone, other times by him and a pair of golden women. They spoke to each other as if I didn’t exist, many times in languages I couldn’t even recognize.

  
On the fifth day, a woman with a severe bun and a military-esque uniform came in and placed a small disk on my neck. The disk immediately attached itself painfully into my skin. If I could have cried out I would have; it was as if I had just been bitten by a small metal rodent. She then grabbed a small needle off the nearest tray, full of a mean looking yellow liquid. She injected me through the arm and the reaction was almost immediate: the paralysis I had felt for the last five days was wearing off rapidly as every vein in my body burned.

  
“You will meet the Grand Master soon. He’s not one to suffer fools so keep your mouth shut and accept your fate.” Her disinterested and gruff voice was familiar, but I couldn’t place it. She gave the chair a shove and it started moving on its own, leading me to a doorway and through it.

  
The world around me started to go black and I feared I was passing out again until a calm female voice started speaking, “Fear not, for you are found. You are home and there is no going back. No one leaves this place. But what is this place? The answer is: Sicar.” The darkness was suddenly shattered with light, disorienting images floating around me. “Surrounded by cosmic gateways, Sicar lives on the edge of the known and unknown. It is the collection point for all lost and unloved things. Like you. But here on Sicar, you are significant; you are valuable; here you are loved; and no one loves you more than the Grand Master. He is: the original, the first lost, and the first found, the creator of Sicar and father of the Contest of Champions. Where once you were nothing, now you are something. You are the property of the Grand Master. Congratulations. You will meet the grand master in 5 seconds, prepare yourself. You are now meeting the Grand Master.” The images that had been a combination of an unrecognizable galaxy, the representation of the building of a futuristic city, and a gladiator style battle blended together and all at once disappeared, leaving me in a large room facing a flashy man sitting above me on a dais.

  
The man looked to be in his mid-fifties with white and grey hair. His clothing consisted of a bright blue and red tunic over gold pants with a golden robe that seemed long enough to trail behind him like a bride’s train. He scrutinized me with his light brown eyes, lined in a metallic blue. Next to him was the gruff woman who had confined me to the chair.

  
After not being able to speak for that last five days, it was hard to remember exactly how to do it, making my words clumsy and disjointed, “What is… here? Why am I—what is—why?”

  
“Delightful, simply delightful!” his words were disconcerting.

  
Trying again I opened my mouth, but before I could speak the woman pressed a golden button and pain shot through my entire body from that small disk she put on my neck. “Stop your blabbering, Terran.”

  
“Topaz, that will not be necessary. She’s confused. It’s understandable.” The pain stopped and I collapsed back into the chair weakly. I glared openly at the woman called Topaz. “ooh, do you see that Topaz? She has fire. Spunk. I’m digging her vibes.”

  
Looking around, I saw a small group of soldiers dressed oddly with masks and spears. The room was incredibly large, golden like it seems everything else is in this place, more a great hall than a room.

  
“I want a closer look. Topaz, move me closer.” Topaz gave his throne a push and he glided towards me. He looked me up and down, scrutinizing every inch of my five foot four frame. I only just realized that I was no longer in the jeans and sweatshirt I had been in when I arrived in the junkyard. Instead, I was now wearing a short yellow skater dress, revealing both my legs and my chest.

  
“Who put this on me?” I looked unseeingly down at the ground, eyes wide with repressed rage.

  
“Oh, she spoke again! Much better this time. What was that my dear?” the Grand Master looked more amused than disturbed.

  
“Where are my clothes?”

 

“Oh my dear, those have been destroyed. Simply unbefitting your new position.”

  
“And what position is that?”

  
“Watch your tone when addressing the Grand Master, trash.” Topaz raised the golden devise with the button, a clear threat.

  
The Grand Master put his hand on Topaz’s arm before replying, “A gift, my dear. A gift. You will be a gift to a new friend of mine once you are fully prepared. A way to solidify those special little bonds of friendship.”

  
“Oh fuck no! No, no, no, no!” I struggled harder, the clamps around my wrist creaking with the force of my movements.

  
“Now you can, Topaz. Make it a high one. I can’t have her damaging herself”

  
Topaz leered at me, greedily pushing the button and holding it down until I lost consciousness from the pain. It seemed like the first week I was in this Sicar I spent most of it in involuntary comas. I guess the easiest way to control someone is to render them unconscious.


	2. The Preparation

I awoke in the same small room, no longer attached to the machines, but once again paralyzed. _What the hell is going on?_ The question was no closer to being answered that it had been when I first got there. The only thing that was made clear is that I was to be given to some ‘friend’ of the Grand Master.I laid there for what felt like many hours before someone finally entered the room. It was the two golden girls who had only previously entered with Mr. Pink Panther. They each stood silently next to me, staring without emotion at my immobile body. Without saying anything, they moved away at the exact same time leading me to believe they must be able to communicate to each other. _Maybe through those appendages on their head? Or is that just hair? Anything could be possible here._

The longer I spent in this world, the stranger everything became; I had no idea how this was happening, or why it was happening to me. I couldn’t seem to keep something as simple as time straight, a concept that I had thought was linear and concrete, but now I found it some mixed up ball of wibbly-wobbly (for lack of a better word) stuff. A big mass of confusing events that swirled around in my head, making everything around me hazy. _It’s starting to give me a headache._

They began washing me, using an unfamiliarly sweet liquid that left my skin pearlescent. The fumes of the liquid were intoxicating, adding to the haze and fog that already existed in my mind. They proceeded to apply makeup to my face with what my brain processed as a magic wand and used the same device to color my nails. The yellow liquid-filled syringe came out again, ending my paralysis, but the clensing liquid they had used kept me from being able to move. Their next task was my attire, changing me into a floor length silk, A-line dress that fluttered around me. They stood me up in thin, strappy silver heels, facing a mirrored wall and it was hard to recognize myself: the heels made me look so tall, forcing my body to align in an unfamiliar way. My usually dull grey eyes were striking against the dark brown makeup, even through the haze. The yellow dress was garish against my pale skin, but the shape was ideal for my body, highlighting my larger chest and hips while disguising what I thought of as my problem areas (stomach, arms etc..). _Did it really hide any of that, or was I finally just being unapologetic about it? Did I have anything to apologize for?_

Supporting me on both sides, the golden girls (who I decided to name Blanche and Dorothy) led me down a long hallway. Without their support, I know I would’ve fallen. The heels were much higher than anything I had ever worn and the liquid was still affecting me. They stopped in front of a comically large door, Topaz waiting with that same bored expression she always seemed to wear and fiddling with the golden buzzer in her hand.

“So, she can clean up well.” She scoffed at me before continuing, “now you are to stand silently, docile and meek. Keep your head down unless told otherwise by the Grand Master. Act up and I will be forced to use this.” She held up the button into my eye line.

_I can barely stand; you think I am going to fight back? You think I can speak? If I could, you’d be getting an earful, you evil little cunt!_ Unable to do anything else, I continued to focus on staying upright.

“I’ll take that as an acquiescence of understanding. Take her in.”

We entered that same large gold hall towards the area where I had first met the Grand Master. _So this is what it would’ve looked like if I hadn’t been put through the hallway of mental fuckery. I didn’t miss much, just more and more gold. Compensating much, Mr. Grand Master?_ Walking slowly as I couldn’t move any faster without falling on my ass or my face, Blanche and Dorothy guided me to a side hall, filled with music and flashing lights much like a night club. Standing behind the DJ booth was the Grand Master. He was wearing the same basic clothing as the time before, switching out the red and blue tunic for an aggressively purple one. After spotting us, he shuffled down from the raised stand, beaming at me.

“You’re here! Finally,” he clasped my shoulders and I inwardly cringed at the contact, careful not to let it appear on my face; Topaz’s threat of pain was doing what it intended: keeping me in line. “Come, come.” He gestured for the group to follow him to a side area full of low couches.

I tried to sit, but Blanche and Dorothy’s death grips on my arms kept me standing.

“He should be here soon, I called for him to meet here. Will you check on it, Topaz?”

“Of course, sir” Topaz disappeared the way we came, leaving me with the golden girls and the Grand Master.

“My dear, you really do look incredible.” He narrowed his eyes and smirked, “Simply delicious.” _Cringe, again._ “This is going to be just so wonderful! He’s going to love you!”

_'He'? Who is this ‘he’? What about me is 'he' supposed to love?_


	3. The Presentation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Thanks for the Kudos and Comments!

The Grand Master continued to look at me, analyzing every inch of my body until Topaz returned moments later accompanied by another.

I had been told to keep my eyes down, but my curiosity got the better of me. The man was a god. An actual one, I am not exaggerating. It was Loki of Asgard. Or Jotenheim. _I’m not sure exactly which it_ _is at this point_. I had seen him once before, on television as he led an army of aliens in attack on New York City. He had looked off then, thin with sunken bright blue eyes and a wan complexion. As he appeared before me today, he looked strong, healthy and almost unnaturally attractive. His long dark hair was brushed back from his striking face with cheekbones that would draw blood. He stood with impeccable posture, clearly from his upbringing as a prince.

Topaz saw me staring at him and clicked her little button. The two golden girls were forced to bear my entire weight as the pain surged through me. Loki barely glanced my way, choosing instead to sit by the Grand Master on the couch.

“Your excellency! What an honor to be summoned by you, what is it I can do for you?” even his voice was incredible: rich and velvety.

“That’s just it, young prince, it is I that have something for you!”

The air shifted. I couldn’t see it as I was facing the ground, but I could feel Loki tense.

“Not necessary, Grand Master. Your hospitality has already exceeded any expectation I ever could have; a lifesaving gift.”

“Oh pshaw! Visiting royalty are to be treated as such. Intergalactic relations are not to be ignored. You aren’t planning on refusing my gift are you?”

Topaz gripped an odd sort of scepter, long and metallic with a spiral leading up to a rounded orange end. Something told me it wasn’t just for show.

“Of course not, Grand Master. I would never dream of insulting you in such a manner.”

“Wonderful! I would like to introduce you to your gift: Prince Loki, meet our newest citizen.” He probably gestured to me because I could feel everyone’s eyes on me.

“My gift is a woman?”

“Yes! From your universe, I believe. We call it Terra.”

“A Midgardian?” The disgust in his voice as he said the Asgardian name of my home planet was nearly inaudible, but I heard it. He apparently still hasn’t gotten over his hatred of Earth and its inhabitants. _Ever heard of building a bridge and getting the fuck over it already?_

“Is that what you call Terra? What a silly name. It isn’t in the middle of anywhere.”

With a slow and agonizingly calm voice, Loki explained, “On the tree of life, Yggdrasil, Midgard is located somewhere in the middle, hence its name.”

The Grand Master dismissed Loki’s words with a wave of his hands, “Still silly.”

Glancing up as far as I dared, I saw Loki’s fists clench on his knees. The Grand Master was really getting to him. _Who knew Mr. mischief and trickery had such thin skin?_

“Anyway, she is my gift to you. A toy with which to pass the time.”

“I am very grateful, your excellency. If it is your wish that she be mine, then so shall it be. Would a request for larger accommodations be out of line?”

“Oh, no! Not at all. Logical, logical. See to it Topaz!” he snapped his fingers, “We can’t have the girl thinking lesser of us or the prince.”

Topaz left obediently, and with her went the golden button. I was finally able to look up and when I did I caught Loki staring at me with a mixture of interest and disgust. When he spotted my gaze, he quickly turned his attention back to the Grand Master who was regaling us all with a recap of one of the more recent fights.

“—and I said to the guy, ‘never bet against my champion, he can’t be beat!’” he paused and everyone laughed as they were expected. “Loki, you really must come see one of the contests.”

“Of course Grand Master, it would be an honor.”

“We have another bout in two weeks, I will see to it that you attend. You’ll finally get to see what makes me such a popular ruler.”

“I look forward to it.” He paused then, as if carefully choosing his next words, “If you pardon my rudeness, I would very much like to adjourn this discussion and take my new gift back to my quarters. If that is permissible.”

“My goodness! Of course you’d be excited to test the girl out. Topaz should have made the arrangements by now. I will have her send you the new location and Leil and Teil will help escort the girl.”

_Leil and Teil? More like Blanche and Dorothy, ya fool_. “Thank you for being a friend” starting taking over my mind as they pulled me along. _You would see the biggest gift would be…me? Fuck._


	4. Now We're Alone

They marched me along behind Loki through long corridors and up glass elevators. My feet barely touched the ground at this point, Blanche and Dorothy supporting most of my weight. _How strong are these beasts?_ In the last elevator I realized that if I could have processed anything more than five feet in front of me I would have been on sensory overload. As it was, all I could see was Loki’s ass. And what an ass, it should really be criminal to have an ass like that. _Is this the sparkly stuff on my skin, or is his ass just that fine?_ The doors opened and he exited first, with the three of us gal pals following suit. _Am I now Rose? Nope. I am a Sophia if ever there was one._

Loki stopped at a green door with gilded edges, pressing his right hand to a pad to the left of it and the door swung open. The girls pushed me through after Loki and Blanche leaned me against a wall while Dorothy handed Loki the golden buzzer. They left without saying a word and I was now alone with Loki.

Unable to move on my own I stayed pressed to the wall awkwardly, watching him move around the large living space. Everything but him remained blurry, like my mind gave up processing new images in favor of keeping him in complete focus.

After a few more minutes where he checked each room, he glanced at me; his stare was cold and calculating. He left the room then, and I was plunged into the fog completely without any tether to ground me. The floor felt loose under my feel like sand on a hill and I could tell I was about to fall. _This isn’t me, right? It’s all been one horrible nightmare, and this is just me realizing it, right? Lucid dreaming and all that?_ As I began my descent towards the floor, two cold arms wrapped around my torso, steadying me.

“How useless are you that you can’t even stay upright?” his words were harsh, and, though I tried to respond, all that came out was a faint whine. “I know not all of your kind are this useless, is it just the luck of the draw that I receive a broken human?” He looked at my face, then his expression changed from one of disgust to one of exasperation when his eyes continued to look me over, taking in the pearlescent quality of my skin. “Damn them. Thimvale serum: they drugged you.”

He shifted, lifting me roughly over one shoulder and carried me to a side room that turned out to be a bathroom. Placing me unceremoniously in the shower against its wall, he turned it on in full force. The icy cold water was a major shock to my system, making me gasp, the first real sound I had made in days. It soaked through my dress, weighing me down until I was sitting under the stream, the serum slowly running off my skin. Once it was all off, Loki turned the shower off and threw a towel at me.

“Dry off, then come to the common room.” he left me there in the shower, a wet mess in a long soaked dress.

I did as best as I could, ringing the dress out until I thought I could stand in it. I forgot about the heels, twisting my left ankle and tripping over the hem of the dress, crashing to the floor with a cry of pain as my knees collided with the marble.

“What the hell is—?” Loki rushed in to see me on the ground, tears streaming down my face, too tired and in too much pain to move. He raised his hands above me and the long wet dress transformed into a soft, dark grey nightgown that ended at my knees. “You really did a number on yourself.” He was speaking to the damage I had done to my knees when they connected to the floor. There were two large bruises forming, and a split in the skin above my right knee, bleeding profusely down my shin. He placed his hands against the bruises and I felt a warmth spread from them as a green light made the pain vanished. The split resealed itself, not leaving any trace it was ever there, save for the blood still trickling down to my foot. He grabbed the towel I had been using to dry off and began wiping the red liquid away until none remained. He removed the shoes and stood, offering his hand to me.

            I stood gracelessly, still trying to get used to having control of my own body. He left the bathroom, clearly expecting me to follow and I did as best as I could, using the walls and surfaces I passed to keep me upright. Sitting across from him in the space, it finally hit me what situation I was in. The fog had kept me from fully realizing that I was now this man’s toy; this god could do as he wished and I was helpless to stop him while he had that golden buzzer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry that we haven't had any *wink-wink* *nudge-nudge* *poke-poke* yet, I promise some is coming up, I just don't want to rush it


	5. The Way It Is Now

We sat there in silence while I readjusted to having full control of my body and mind. It was a weird sensation, like I was relearning to feel and see; all of my senses were on overdrive. The room we were in was fairly spacious, high ceilings with big white domes that provided light. The couches we were on were a dark green, so dark it was almost black. The walls, light grey in color, were adorned with pop-art renderings of the Grand Master in varying poses. The one of him laid out like Kate Winslet in Titanic made me laugh, something I quickly stifled.

Loki broke the silence first, “So. Are you feeling more yourself?”

“Umm… yes. Thank you.”

“Good. I want it made clear, I had no intention of this situation happening; your presence is unwanted and a nuisance to me. You are to remain in your room, staying quiet and out of my way.”

I kept my eyes focused on the ground to keep myself from crying. _It’s not like I asked for this. No one would ask for this, asshole._ I concentrated on keeping the shake out of my voice, responding with a simple, “Yes.”

“Your room is next to the bathroom you just came from. I will retire to my own room now; you should do the same.” He stood and left the room, the orbs above going dim and leaving me in darkness, alone.

It was a few minutes before I stood, again relying on the surrounding furniture and walls to assist in my movement. The room he indicated was simply furnished with a bed, a dresser, and a chair with an empty bookcase next to it. _This is my world now._

I slipped into the bed, finding it comfortable and warm to my great relief. This was possibly the worst situation I could be in. _He could be a rapist… Thanks brain, you’re right, he could be a rapist. Instead of attacking me he is imprisoning me in a room and depriving me of any social interactions. I really don’t like either option._ I slipped into a restless sleep; waking up repeatedly, and tossing and turning. After several hours, I decided that sleep wasn’t going to stay and chose instead to examine my room more closely. The walls were the same color as the common room, only without the paintings of the Grand Master. The walls were bare, making the room appear even more prisonlike.

In the top drawer of the dresser, I found a pen and note pad. Taking them with me, I sat on the chair, crisscross applesauce. I used to take various art classes when I attended community college back home. I was never very good at it, but it’s better than doing nothing. I tried sketching Blanche and Dorothy from memory; it was a good way to get my mind of my new reality. I moved on to try and sketch any being I had come into contact with from Mr. Pink Panther to the evil cunt Topaz.

I completely lost track of time, exactly as I had intentioned, because I heard movement outside my door. _Loki must be up._ I made to get up but then remembered his words, “You are to remain in your room, staying quiet and out of my way.” _I’ll just stay here then._ The noise of the main entrance opening and closing told me he must be gone, and it would be safe to go to the restroom. I was too scared by his words to even face him.

Upon opening the door, I noticed a small plate of food. _He must’ve left this for me. Can’t have this new toy starving to death._ Though I wasn’t a toy, really. He made it clear he didn’t even want me in his presence, let alone in his bed. But, for appearances sake, I couldn’t die.

 I used to the bathroom quickly, wanting to get back to my room and my makeshift sketchpad. I took the food with me, unrecognizable as it was, finding it palatable but unsatisfying. After a few hours, I heard the main entrance open again. There was no reason to get up so I settled back into the chair, when a knock on my door startled me. _Did I really just hear that, or is it just my imagination?_ The second knock had me on my feet. Opening the door I saw Loki, standing before me in dark red pants and long sleeve shirt. The neckline of the shirt was a wide boat type, showing of his collarbone.

“Yes?” I kept my eyes down, away from his face.

“I need to apologize.”

This shocked me into looking up into his eyes. They were softer than I had ever seen from him.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“I said I need to apologize. I was unfair in my treatment of you last night, and I apologize for that. You had no more say in what happened here than I did. You are not bound to those restrictions I put forth.”

“Oh… thank you.”

“I also realized I never bothered to even find out your name. Very rude on my part.”

“It—it’s Wren.”

“As in the Midgardian bird?”

“Yeah, my mother was an amateur ornithologist.” _What a dumb thing to say._

“What, exactly, is an ornithologist?” the lightness in his voice let me relax a bit.

“Someone who studies birds. She always said it’s what she wanted to do before she had me.”

“In that something you were also interested in?”

“Not really. I don’t have the patience or the ability to remain quiet for that long.” I paused, trying to find the right words before continuing, “I’m sorry, but why are you so interested in me?”

“We are going to be spending quite a lot of time together, it’s only natural I would want to learn more about you. Though I do have to cut this meeting short, as I have more business to attend to. There is food in the kitchen, help yourself.” He gestured to the door across the common area, directly opposite mine.

“Thank you… again.”

“Also, my name is Loki. I realized I also failed to introduce myself.”

Without thinking I blurted out, “Even without those big bendy horns, you’re still recognizable.”

He chuckled and bid me farewell, leaving out into the hall and shutting the door behind him.

_Did I really just say that to Loki, the Norse god who nearly leveled New York? I guess to be fair he didn’t seem to be in control of his actions then. But it doesn’t change the fact he did it, does it? Well, now we’re arguing over semantics. I really need to stop having conversations with myself._

I walked into the common room, feeling steadier on my feet after a night of resting them. These last two days have been an absolute whirlwind of emotions. I was still not entirely clear what my future held but it wasn’t as depressing as it had been before this last conversation. I went through the door he had indicated and found a simply designed kitchen. The foods in the icebox were not recognizable to me, but the grumble of my stomach outweighed my usual pickiness and I grabbed what I assumed to be a fruit of some kind before heading back to my room. _Not ideal for sure, but who knows, this could turn into something interesting._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would love to hear some thoughts: how its progressing, what ya'll would like to see, what is or isn't working, etc. Thanks for all the support, so far!!!


	6. A Different Kind of Gift

The next few days followed in a pattern: Loki leaves before I wake up, and returns right before I fall asleep. It was fairly boring, being alone in this foreign and isolating environment. We had very little interaction for that first week. He was much more polite towards me, but also very distant. He never gets within ten feet of my person, leaving me to ruminate on that moment when he caught my drugged up body before it fell to the floor. _Did he hate me?_ _Was I that repugnant?_ This wasn’t the time to think about that. I had my new reality to manage.

I filled my days with my sketching. Moving from the from-memory portraits to still lifes. I tried playing with angles and lighting, but drawing the same couches and tables began getting monotonous after only one day. The very next morning, a large bouquet of remarkable flowers appeared in the middle of the living room and I was re-inspired. _Did he do that? Did he notice me? No. it can’t be, he was just bringing some brightness to his space. It’s a coincidence that it’s a perfect subject to sketch._

In the arrangement, there were every color flower: orange, pink, red, green, blue. I remember once being told that there were no actual blue flowers in nature; that blue pigments are not able to form at a cellular level and those that appear blue are actually purple, but these flowers were as blue as I had ever seen it. There were impressive shapes: curves that flowed into each other and angles that jutted out sharply in all directions. The flowers also had a great staying power, lasting without wilting for three days straight.

As much as I was not required to segregate myself in my room, I still chose to remain there when he was home. _He had tried to dominate the Earth, not so long ago after all. How many time are we going to go over this? I don’t think he had complete control of his actions. At the very least he was obviously unwell!_

“Murder is murder!” I bellowed to the empty room.

“Well said.”

I turned so fast I slipped off the chair I had pulled from the dining area.

“Loki. I didn’t hear you come back. I’m sorry, I’ll get out of your way.”

“I told you that you didn’t have to do that. This is as much your home now, as it is mine.” He sat across from me, crossing his legs elegantly before continuing, “what prompted that statement?”

“Just a conversation I was having with myself.” _Dummy! Now you look crazy! Fix it!_ I quickly added, “you know, internal dialogues and all that.” _Did that fix it?_

He let out a short quiet laugh, “I am fully aware of one’s internal dialogue. I don’t think my mind has ever been silent.”

An uncomfortable silence fell. Well uncomfortable for me at least. He seemed cool as a cucumber. _Are cucumbers really that cool?_ _They do make a great gazpacho. Thanks brain, I’ll bring that up._ _“Hey Loki, did you know cucumbers make for a great cold soup?_

“Did you find the flowers to your liking?” his question startled me out of my cucumber funk.

“The flowers were for me?”

“I noticed you carry that ledger around with you to draw. There were not a great many things to use for subjects so I thought it would help.”

I was touched, and shocked. _He did it for me. He really did._ “They’re fascinating; like nothing I have ever seen before.”

“I had the same reaction: true other worldly beauty.” He stared into the flowers and I stared at him. _Talk about other worldly beauty._ His skin glowed in the soft light of the orbs above, contrasting sharply with his raven hair. Ethereal is too blasé a term to describe his perfection. _Get a grip on yourself, Wren. You’re practically drooling!_

“Before I forget, I brought you something that might help pass the time.” He reached inside a bag he placed on the floor next to him and pulled out a small book. “It’s in earth English, I think, though I have no idea as to its significance in your culture or if it even has any at all.”

Taking the book, my fingertips brushed his. I wouldn’t say an electric current passed between us (I’m not that cliché) but I did feel a jolt in my stomach at the contact. The book was a folio version of Shakespeare’s _Romeo and Juliet:_ my least favorite of his works for the sheer aggravation the title characters give me, but still a welcome comfort.

My eyesight blurred with tears I was fighting back. “This is amazing, thank you.”

“It caught my attention, I’m glad you appreciate it. I was invited to a gathering by the Grand Master, so I will be off and home late tonight. Farewell.” He stood and gave a small bow towards me, before leaving again.

I pulled the book into my chest, relishing in the feel of the binding, the smell of the pages. I had a small piece of home to keep with me. I opened it up to a random page and read, “O serpent heart hid with a flowering face!/ Did ever dragon keep so fair a cave?/ Beautiful tyrant! Fiend angelical!” (III.ii.73-5). _Is Loki a snake in disguise?_


	7. And So It Goes

I read and reread the play over and over again, using it as my new muse. I would set scenes in my sketchbook: Romeo imploring Juliet under her balcony, their secret marriage by the Friar, their first night together. The last was immediately torn out and thrown in the corner, like its presence in my book sullied its surrounding images. _How horny am I?_ I felt like I was rushing through images, trying to get them penciled before they left my mind. I never spent multiple consecutive hours on any single page, instead flipping between them to finish aspects. The drawings were getting better, though as it was only me who saw them you can take that with a grain of salt.

I was contemplating drawing my flat mate when a soft knock on my door startled me. _Is his goal in life to scare me as often as possible?_ I stood from my bed and opened the door. He was standing before me in an all-black structured suit-like outfit with his hands behind his back, a pleasant smile on his face.

“Good evening, Lady Wren. I hope I find you well.”

_Lady?_ _Again?_ “I’m quite well, thanks. You’re back early.”

His left eyebrow raised and his smile turned into a smirk, “Is that right?”

“I mean—I think so—I don’t know—” Thoroughly flustered, I brushed my long, dark hair behind my ear, looking away while I felt the blush burn across my face. “Is there something you needed?”

“I came across another tome like the last that you might be interested in.” bringing his hands forward, he produced a much rattier book than the last, but the embossed words on the cover made my heart clench, “ _Hamlet, Prince of Denmark.”_ My favorite tragedy. A perfectly written work of art that has inspired countless artists over the years. “It’s by the same author, correct?”

“Yes, thought to be one of his crowning achievements.”

“It is by divine happenstance that I came across these works, I am pleased they are you your satisfaction.”

“Very much so. I can’t really express how much they mean to me.”

“I am gratified by your appreciation.”

I smiled at him, careful not to maintain eye contact for too long. “Off again?”

“Unfortunately, yes. The Grand Master requires my presence once again.”

“Ah. Well, have…fun?” _Was it fun, hanging with the Grand Creep?_

“Fun would never be my word for it, more like work.”

“Work?”

“One must be careful to maintain a certain air whilst in his presence; he is quick to execute anyone he perceives as against him.”

“Sounds scary.”

“It’s less scary if you grew up well versed in lies, like I have been.”

“Well, I wish you luck then.”

“I gladly accept it, Lady Wren. Good Evening.”

            I watched him leave from my doorway. He walked with such confidence and grace. It wasn’t fair that this was the same man that had committed such atrocities back home. _For Fuck’s sake— Not now Brain, I know, I know!_

I began looking forward to the moments we spent together, however brief they were. It felt like months had gone by, the passage of time only marked by those encounters. Every few meetings, I would be presented with a new book. Some were unknown to me; some were old favorites. Either way, they were my anchors; they kept me connected to my home. Slowly, Loki was filling that previously empty bookcase, and I was relishing in it. I had never been able to keep any kind of book collection, even in college; needing instead to rent or return books due to my own financial situation. I now had my own library, albeit small, to peruse.

Some evenings, I was graced with his presence for a longer time meaning he was released from some evening obligation to the Grand Master early. By longer, I mean he was home for twenty to thirty minutes before retiring to his room. One such evening, we sat on the couches facing the most recent floral arrangement made up of dinner-plate-sized orange roses and long spiky blue-green grasses.

“So, you mentioned your mother was an, Arnithologist? Is that right?”

“Ornithologist, but yeah. An amateur one at least.” _That was, like, three months ago. How did he remember that?_

“So, what is the significance in your name?”

“Well, she said wrens were always thought of as small and inconspicuous, but had very loud and complex songs. I was born premature, with an ear splitting cry so I guess that fits, and I have always been the talker of the family.”

“You seem so quiet, are you hiding yourself from me?” A smirk and a gleam in his eye made me blush.

“I’m still trying to figure out what I am here.”

“Does one’s location dictate their person?”

“When one’s freedom is stolen and is then forced to become something other than one has ever identified as before, one must reevaluate the self and adapt accordingly.” I realized after saying it, that it might be taken as rude; as if I was blaming him for my captivity. Glancing up, I saw a contemplative face rather than an irritated one.

“I hadn’t thought of that before. What exactly did you do before arriving here?”

“I was a student of sixteenth-century literature.”

“I forget how young your world is, sixteen centuries.”

“We were up to the twenty-first, and, before humans, it did exist for millions of years.” I felt a weird drive to defend the earth, like a teenager who was called a kid by an older cousin.

“How correct you are, my mistake. I meant, I forgot how young your race is.”

“That, I will accept.”

“Well thank you, Milady. I appreciate your acceptance, ever your humble servant.” He stood, miming a deep bow with a dramatic flourish of his hands, making me simultaneously laugh out loud and blush. “On that note, Lady Wren, I bid you a good night.”

I tried to hide the disappointment on my face as I joined him in standing, each of us heading to our respective doors. I was stuck wishing for more time with him. _I’m becoming addicted to him. Is this a good turn of events? Am I some dumb damsel desperately clinging to the nearest male? Bitch, you are strong, brilliant and wonderful; if anything, he’s clinging to you! Thanks Brain, I appreciate the boost._

 


	8. The Dinner

The next real encounter came almost two weeks later. It started as a normal day, the only difference being I chose to take an afternoon nap. It was one of those dead to the universe type of naps, where you wake up unsure of day, time, or even your own identity. I groggily sat up, picking the gunk out of my eyes while trying to reestablish my own identity. The lighting in my room was dimmed, slowly brightening to match my mental state.

After a few moments, I realized something was off; there were noises coming from somewhere in the flat. I righted myself quickly, combing through my hair and smoothing the simple white nightgown I had donned before the nap. Creeping out through the door, I located the source of the noise: the kitchen. The door was ajar, so I pushed through it as was gifted with the sexiest image I had ever seen: Loki cooking.

He was dressed casually: a green linen shirt with the sleeves pushed past his elbows, black linen pants with no shoes, an apron tied around his waist. He had his hair pulled back into a bun, a look that worked on few men, but emphasized his bone structure perfectly. I stood there dumbfounded for a few moments before he looked up from the pot he was stirring, a gentle smile gracing his face.

“Finally up I see, sleep well”

“Like a log. What’s going on?”

“I was granted the entire afternoon and evening free from any obligations and wanted to surprise you with dinner. My latest find was a book of instructions for earth food, written by some beautiful woman.” He pointed to a book propped up to his left, with a smiling Chrissy Teigen eating a forkful of some pasta dish.

“She is one of my favorite celebrities, hilarious and a great cook.”

“The smells coming off of this are indicating as such. It should be ready in about ten minutes, if you would like to get cleaned up. There is a package for you in the living room.”

“Oh, thank you.” I left, spotting the brown package laying on the table near my door. Opening it in my room, I found a pair of dark grey, fitted ankle-skimming slacks and a green peplum style blouse. Every article of clothing I had received before would be classified as either pajamas or lounge-wear. This was much more business-like, like I would wear to my old internship at the publishing company. It was wonderful to wear something like this again, as Polonius said in _Hamlet_ , “For the apparel oft proclaims the man” (II.iii.73). I felt stronger in these clothes, sliding on the black ballerina flats that I found in the bottom of the package.

I stood in front of the bathroom mirror, trying, in vain, to shape my hair in any way without tools. I gave up, resigned to what I had. A soft knock and a “Pardon me” alerted me to Loki’s presence at the open bathroom door.

“You look wonderful.”

“Not too shabby yourself.” He had changed into a light grey suit, void of a tie, his hair still in the bun. The whole look showed off his collarbone deliciously. _You’re only thinking like this because you’re hungry._

“Would you like some help?” he gestured to the mop of hair I had given up on.

“Sure, thank you.”

He concentrated on my hair and a green glow surrounded me while it pulled itself into a simple French twist at the back of my head.

“There. That should do it.”

We walked in step with each other towards the never used dining room. Once seated across from one another, I took in the dish laid before me. It was a Cacio e pepe, or cheese and pepper dish made with some type of citrus, a green leafy vegetable and unmistakably pancetta.

“How did you get all the ingredients for this?”

 “The Grand Master rewards those loyal to him, as you know. I used some of that political capital to procure the means necessary to prepare this.”

“Is that the best use of what capital you have?”

“Are you questioning my judgement?” His face was neutral, not giving me any indication of how I should respond.

“Yes?” He waited a few moments, making me sweat and worry that I had been too flippant and careless in my response before he broke into a wide smile, almost laughing. Seeing such delight on his face was mildly disconcerting. Before now, all I had experienced was a small smirk or subtle smile; this was unadulterated joy.

“You are incredible, honestly. A constant surprise.” His eyes bore into mine and I couldn’t look away.

“Thank you?”

“It is a good thing. I wasn’t excited for this arraignment at the start—“

“You’re telling me.” _You interrupted him?! Why?! Let the man speak! “_ Sorry.”

“It’s quite alright. While it wasn’t what I wanted at the start, your presence has been a positive thing on my life, possibly the only at the moment.”

I sat stock-still. _Did he just say that I was the only good thing in his life?_

Loki continued on as if he hadn’t just dropped a bomb on me, “Would you like some wine?”

“Sure.” I could only get one word out. My mind was working on overtime, trying to calm my ego down. _You aren’t really the only good thing in his life. Must I remind you he is a god? He has lived for thousands of years and experienced thousands of things. You are a blip, a tiny fucking blip on his radar._

Switching focus to the food in front of me, I took my first bite and was instantly transported back home. The flavor was amazing, completely distracting me from the mental breakdown that had started.

“Oh. My. God!” my eyes rolled back in my head as I relished in the taste of the dish.

“I take it that you find it adequate.”

“More than adequate, it’s fucking magnificent!” I clapped my hand over my mouth, “Sorry, I’ve always cursed a sailor.”

“I don’t know exactly what that means, but you can speak however you’d like.”

We continued our meal in silence, the sounds of forks and plates filling the room. Once we finished what was on our plates, Loki stood and cleared them, asking me to stay seated. I heard him enter the room behind me and ask me to close my eyes. _Do I trust him enough? If he wanted to do something bad, he already would have, calm your tits girl!_

I followed his instruction and closed my eyes. There was something placed before me and a low voice in my ear whispered, “You can look now.” when I opened them, I was greeted by the most decadent looking chocolate tart. My eyes lit up.

I took a deep breath before exhaling the word “chocolate” like I was getting high from its presence. After taking a bite I groaned. “This is fantastic.”

“So it’s to your liking?” Loki was still behind me, watching me carefully.

“I cannot believe that you did all this for me. I really don’t deserve it.”

He moved to his seat opposite me at the table, a slice placed in front of him as well, “I wasn’t being hyperbolic in my statement before; you truly have given me much in the way of simple comforts and peace of mind.”

The blush was like a fire going up my chest, through my hairline. It took me a couple moments before I remembered I had taken a bite and needed to swallow before saying, “I didn’t do anything. I was just here.”

“You do more than you realize, milady.” His eyes caught mine, sending a spark into my abdomen. _Maybe it’s just the chocolate?_

After finishing our dessert, Loki walked me back to my room, bidding me a good night before retiring to his own.

_This night was insane! It had such a romantic vibe, did he mean for that to happen? Am I just reading too much into it? What the hell is my life?_

I quickly changed out of the nice clothes he had provided, placing them in their own drawer of honor. _Whether he meant it in any deeper way is irrelevant, it meant a lot to me._ Sliding into the blankest of my bed, I fell asleep fast, dreaming of flying chocolate tart-ships that shot noodles out of the guns.

Loki was gone before I woke up, not uncommon but I still felt a little disappointed at not seeing him. I went about my usual routine of showering, changing into a comfy, lounge-y set, and drawing what ever caught my eye.

Around midday, I was alarmed by the door slamming open and Loki storming in. He was fuming, his shoulders tight with tension and his eyes bright. His fists clenched and the furniture near him blasted away, a vase of flowers shattering against a wall.

“Loki, what’s wrong?”

His head snapped towards me, and the tension and anger in his body released slightly. “The Grand Master has requested my presence at the fight tonight.”

“That isn’t uncommon is it?”

He clenched his jaw before locking eyes and adding, “He has also requested I bring you along.”

The blood in my body froze. _I’m to be paraded around in front of the Grand Creep? Why has he waited so long to ask this of us? What is he playing at?_


	9. The Fight

We stood like that for a few moments, staring into each other’s eyes before I finally spoke, “What does this mean?”

“I really don’t know. He did not say.” Loki started pacing while I sank down onto a chair.

“You seem really upset, did something else happen?”

“It’s the way he asked for your presence. I’m probably just reading into it. I just – I just don’t like the thought of him… near you.”

_Near me? What’s with this protective side of him? It’s kinda hot. Shut up brain!_

“He said he will send you something to wear. It’ll probably be as garish as that garment he had you in before.” He stopped his pacing and sat next to me, angled so he could face me better. “I promise that I will not let anything happen to you.” He looked searchingly into my face.

“I can do this. If you’re there, I can do this.”

He placed his hand on mine, silently sharing his strength. He stood then, leaving the flat with me drowning in a sea of thoughts. I was to be displayed to the Grand Master, dressed by him and toyed with as he pleased. I had Loki on my side, but even he would not be able to stand up to him if the situation arose. _I have to be strong. He’ll smell the fear and weakness on me._

The day flew by, evening coming before I was ready. The package with the dress arrived a couple hours after Loki left. There was a knock on the door and I tentatively opened it, shoved aside by Blanche and Dorothy who brought the package and a couple others in with them. The dress was a drop-waist, meant to be fitted well to my body but another terrible shade of yellow. The bright lemon yellow made me feel like big bird especially when I saw the accompanying strappy black stilettos, knowing I would be flapping my arms to maintain balance.

            The forced me to sit on the vanity chair in the bathroom, using the magic wand things to apply my makeup and nails again. They created a grey smoky eye, highlighted with metallic silver. My lips were painted nude, subtle to balance with the intense eyes. my long hair was curled, big barrel curls tumbling down my back, elegantly secured back from my face with pearl studded pins.

            They left me, thoroughly poked and prodded and looking annoyingly incredible. _Girl, he’s gonna flip. He isn’t going to care_. The heels were my real enemy. I was not drugged this time, but even without it I was having a hard time standing on my own. I had some time before the event so I decided to practice in the full outfit. I put the dress on myself, careful not to smudge my makeup. The color was awful, but the shape was amazing. I felt like a bombshell, something I had never felt before in my life.

I started wobbling around the flat, trying to avoid using the surfaces around me and sadly failing; the heels of the shoes were so thin I wasn’t able to maintain any sense of balance. _I am going to make a fool out of myself in front of everyone! Especially him…Goddammit brain, shut the fuck up!_

“I don’t need this right now!”

“Don’t need what?”

The voice surprised me, causing me to spin wildly and trip forward. Loki caught me in his arms and chuckled, “You and those shoes don’t seem like a match.”

I righted myself trying to hide the blush creeping up my neck. “When did you get back?”

“Just now, you didn’t hear me?”

“I was…concentrating.”

“I can see that.” The amused smile on his face faded, “Are you almost ready?”

“As ready as I can be.”

“As I said, I will be with you. I won’t let anything happen, just follow my lead.”

I nodded and smoothed the dress down, standing straight and putting my game face on. Loki looked me up and down, his eyes darkening slightly.

“You look wonderful, even in that color.” He offered me his arm, something I took with much appreciation as there was absolutely no way I would be able to get there without his assistance.

We walked at an agonizingly slow pace, Loki walking as fast as I was able to. I realized that was why he wanted to leave earlier: he already knew that the travel time would be long. The arena was adjacent to the royal palace, but we still had to take a shuttle to get there. Entering the large viewing room, I saw it was already full of elegantly dressed beings, mingling around. When we entered they all turned to face us. The Grand Master appeared from the right and clapped his hands together. The rest followed suit. _What the hell are the applauding?_ He came forward and extended his hand towards me, and I looked at it confused.

Loki whispered in my ear, “Curtsy and kiss it.” I looked up at him glaring and the subtle pleading in his eyes softened me. I did as was expected.

“Simply ravishing my dear. Just delectable. And you don’t look half bad yourself Prince.” His eyebrows waggled at Loki. _So he swings both ways, interesting._

He signaled for us to follow and we did, to a long couch facing an entirely windowed wall. It overlooked a large arena with thousands of people. Loki had an odd smile on his face, so fake and rehearsed. _Since they had never seen his real one, they must think it is real._ We sat on one end of the couch, opposite the Grand Master.

“The fight’s just about to start, you’ll love it. My champion is unbeatable.” The glee and malice in his voice was incredibly disconcerting.

The lights in the arena dimmed, highlighting the center ring. A large, transparent creature entered the ring and I saw what he was talking about. The creature was transparent but the skin gleamed like it was covered in some type of invisible armor. He was holding a large spear, easily ten feel long and spun it around expertly. _I wouldn’t want to go against this champion._

The Grand Master put a long metallic instrument to his mouth, some type of microphone and spoke, “The Challenger, Antek of the Tekarians. Now rise and greet your champion!” _He’s not the champion?!_

The entire stadium rose, mimicking the spectators. A doorway was revealed and through it strode The Hulk. My eyes widened, and I glanced at Loki whose jaw clenched.

“This is your champion?” I was in too much shock to realize I spoke directly to the Grand Master.

“Why yes, my dear. He is magnificent, isn’t he.”

I opened my mouth to speak again but Loki’s hand on my knee stopped me. The fight was savage; the Tekarian obliterated by The Hulk in minutes. Six more contenders entered the ring, each cut down by the Hulk in brilliant ways.

After the last fighter was squashed into a disgusting jelly, the Grand Master raised the microphone saying, “A wonderful display again. Your champion has succeeded and for that we must celebrate!”

The wall of window became opaque, blending into those around it. The viewing party transitioned into a celebration with loud music bumping and trays of different foods and drinks being passed around. Even the couch we were on spun and we were now facing the revelry. The Grand Master slid closer to us.

“I am so happy to see that this match has worked out.”

“Oh yes, just magnificently Grand Master.”

“I hope he’s not wearing you out too much, my dear.” He placed his hand on my thigh and I shrank away from him. “So prince, how is she?”

Loki’s fist clenched but he managed to keep his voice light, “Beyond any expectations, your Excellency.”

“Details, I need details.”

I narrowed my eyes flirtatiously. _If Loki could put on an act, so can I._ “Grand Master, if it isn’t too bold of me, I think you might like my perspective a bit more than his.”

He leaned back, an amused expression on his face, “Go on then.”

I tried to mask the stress and fear growing in my chest. I avoided Loki’s gaze, hoping he wouldn’t be too upset that I strayed from whatever plan he had in place.

“Well I don’t know if you are aware of some of his pseudonyms, but he definitely lives up to the Silver-Tongued God.”

“Ha! That’s fantastic! She is fantastic!”

Loki relaxed, his tense muscles releasing. He chuckled along with the Grand Master, “Yes, she really is.”

“Well you two enjoy the party, I need to mingle.” He wiggled his shoulders and danced away into the crowd.

Loki turned his head towards me, “That was risky.”

“I’m sorry. I did it without thinking.” I turned to face him and saw a kind of prideful smile gracing his face.

“It was pretty clever to turn the conversation from you.” His smile changed to a smirk when he continued, “So what was that about my silver-tongue again?”

I pushed him, hiding my blush as well as I could. We stayed on that couch for the next hour or so, talking about random little things. He had become interested in the plays he had found for me adding to our discussions, giving me a position of authority over him. _Though he annoyingly picked the works up quickly._

The party was slowing down when the Grand Master came back over to us, sitting closely to me. “How is my favorite couple?”

“Just fine, Grand Master. Thinking about retiring soon.” Loki grabbed my hand and made to get up but was stopped by the Grand Master.

“No, no, no. You can’t leave before I see a kiss.”

“You’re serious?”

“Of course, I’m feeling puckish. Go on then.”

Loki hesitated, I knew he didn’t want to do this but we couldn’t risk angering the Grand Creep. I reached my hand up and threaded my fingers into his hair, pulling his face down to mine. His lips were uncertain against mine at first but grew insistent quickly. He grabbed hold of my head, taking charge of the kiss, deepening it. His tongue grazed my lower lip asking for access and I granted it, sighing into his mouth. Reality came back to me when he pulled away, staying close but separating our mouths.

“Stirring, simply stirring.” We snapped our attention back to the Grand Master who was leering at us.

“As I had said before, we should really return to our chambers. A wonderful party as always, Grand Master.”

“Yes, yes. Please take her, take her.” He winked at Loki, then switched his attention to me, “Be a good girl now.” _Cringe! The cringiest of cringes!_

We stood, Loki keeping me close to him. We walked like that, him behind me and guiding me forward. Once near the shuttles, Loki pulled me to one side pressing me against a wall.

“They’re still watching; let’s make it convincing.” Before I could react his lips were on mine again. His arms were on either side of my face, trapping me. _What a glorious trap. Brain, not now! It’s only for show._ He pressed himself into me, causing a spark deep in my abdomen. His mouth left mine, but he continued trailing kisses along my jaw and neck. Stopping at my ear, he whispered, “I’m sorry, it just really needs to be convincing. That should be enough though, let’s go.”

The rest of the journey back was rather uneventful until the last hundred feet. I couldn’t walk anymore so Loki offered to carry me. He picked me up princess style, his hands dangerously close to my backside. I held on close, pressing my chest into his so I wouldn’t have to look into his eyes. When we entered the flat, he didn’t immediately put me down.

“I am sorry that had to happen. It was not my intention to force you to do anything of the sort.”

I glanced up at him, he seemed genuinely upset. “Loki, you don’t have anything to apologize for. It was the Grand Master who ordered it, not you.” I paused, trying to find the best way to articulate what it was I wanted to say before continuing, “Also, it wasn’t that bad. You’re a good kisser.” _Did I just tell a god he was a good kisser? You let me down again, brain. I’m still in his arms for fuck’s sake!_

“I appreciate your compliment.” He looked down at me with a real tenderness in his eyes.

“Um, well. You can put me down now.” _Or never, if you’d like._

“Yes, yes. Sorry.” He placed me on the couch gently so I could remove my shoes. “I will retire now, I’m in desperate need of a cooling shower. I bid you a good night, Lady Wren.”

“Yes, to you as well.” I watched him leave, melting slightly into the couch when he was out of sight. We kissed. It was an incredible kiss, one of those toe curling kisses you read about, and we even had two of them. _See he does like you! No, he’s only keeping me safe._ But that look he gave me just before putting me down gave me some serious pause. _What is to come of this?_


	10. The Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it has been so long! It was the finals week of my last term as an Undergrad and it was pretty hectic. I will sadly not be posting for a week or so because I am going on a trip and wont have my laptop with me. Thank you so much for the Kudos and comments, I really appreciate them!
> 
> This chapter is so much longer because I wanted to make up for my absence. Thanks again!

I was disappointed the next morning when I woke up and Loki was already gone. I went about my usual routine of reading, drawing and snacking on mystery fruit. When evening came, Loki was still nowhere to be found. _He’s usually home by now, where is he?_ I tried staying up to wait for him, but the pull of sleep was much too strong and I wound up waking in the middle of the night with a kink in my neck from sleeping on my chair and decided to just go to bed and see him in the morning. This went on for the next week, with no contact from Loki. I would have thought he wasn’t coming home except his light was sometimes on, shining through the bottom of his door when I would go to the kitchen for a midnight snack.

After eight days of radio silence, I was plucking my courage to confront him when a bright orange envelope slipped under the entrance door. Picking it up, I noticed the letter was kind of addressed to me. Inside was a very elaborate and formal invitation to a party in the Grand Master’s suite with an added folded slip of paper addressed to Loki.

_Now he has to talk to me!_ Standing in front of his bedroom door, I took a deep breath to calm my nerves; I knocked twice and waited. He answered the door quickly dressed in a pair of silk pajamas, the top half buttoned as if I had interrupted him.

“Yes?” _Ok, that was curt._

“This was just slid under our door.” I handed him the two pieces of paper.

“Why did you open this?” _Is he mad? Really?_

“The envelope had my name on it. Well it had ‘female human’ written on it so I rightly assumed I was to open it. That had your name, so I didn’t read it.”

He unfolded his letter and, after a few moments of reading, clenched it in his fist.

“What is it this time?”

“We have been invited to an exclusive party in the Grand Master’s suite.”

“Yeah, I gathered that. It went fine last time, why are you so angry?”

“He’s intrigued by you.” The muscles in his jaw tightened.

“Intrigued? By me?”

“It’s not surprising. I should have expected this after you were so charming. And then there was the—” he stopped suddenly as if he didn’t want to continue his thought.

“The what?”

He looked away from me, “The kiss.”

“Oh. That.” We stood there awkwardly for a while, neither saying anything until I had to break the silence, “Is that all?”

“He also said I am to dress you this time to my own personal liking.”

I blushed. _What does that mean?_ Ignoring that I pressed on, “I read it a little fast, when is the party?”

“Tomorrow night. I think its best we both retire to our own rooms and get some rest.” With that he shut his door, kind of in my face. _That was rude! What the hell is going on with him?_

I did as he said and went to my room, crawling into the bed, but just laid there for what felt like hours overanalyzing everything that had just happened and everything that might happen the next day. When sleep did come, it was still restless and I woke feeling groggy and puffy. Loki was gone, as was the new usual so I tried my best to relax as I knew the party was going to be anything but relaxing.

A garment box arrived midday, but being addressed to Loki and not me I left it on the coffee table unopened. _I wonder what his preference is: Sexy? Modest? Classy? Slutty? Does he even care what I look like? Does he even care about me at all?_ It was hard to fight the negative thoughts swimming through my mind.

When Loki finally did come home, he didn’t say much to me. He went straight into his room and shut the door. _Again? What the hell man?!_ I was ready to give up on any conversation when he emerged from the room wearing a fitted dark green suit, with a black skinny tie and pocket square. He looked incredible. Untouchable.

“Are you not planning on getting dressed?”

“The box was addressed to you; I didn’t want to overstep my bounds.” I kept my voice void of any emotion. _If y_ our _gonna ice me out, so am I. How do you like it Mr. Frosty? I can be passive aggressive too._

He seemed a bit taken aback by my attitude, but brushed it off swiftly “Well it is for you, please get ready quickly. There is an alteration tool in there as well for your makeup, I trust you can figure that out. We don’t have much time so do be hasty.”

Trying to keep my face neutral, I picked up the box and took it to the bathroom. _What a jerk! Telling me what to do and treating me like some type of burden. Well here’s some news for you pal: I can carry my own weight. I don’t need you or any other man to help me, I got this. Hear me fucking roar._ I continued thinking of other comebacks while trying to figure out the magic wand tool. Mimicking what the golden girls had done, I managed to create an exaggerated cat eye with dark dramatic lashes. I made lips a deep red that gave me a bit of a vampy vibe.

The dress was perfect, which really pissed me off. _Asshole is fucking perfect at everything, even picking dresses. What a dick!_ It was an off the shoulder, black 1950’s style tea length dress with dark green crinolines. It made me look like a movie star and I hated him for that. The only thing off was my hair, but I had no way to fix that so I just left it hanging naturally. I slipped on the black kitten heels and exited the bathroom feeling both incredible and unsure.

Looking up, I caught Loki staring, speechless at me. A casual wave of his hand and my hair shaped itself into elegant wave like those of old movie starlets.

_That’s right asshole, I’m phenomenal and you are a jerk for ignoring me. Mess with him! Mess with him!_ My mind commanded me and I was all too willing to oblige, “Would you mind helping me with the zipper?” I turned around, revealing the open zipper that exposed my entire back.

He stood and walked toward me, taking the zipper and pulling it closed, slowly. _Mayday! Mayday! Its backfiring! He’s too fucking sexy!_ After he had finished zipping it up all the way, his hand lingered on my shoulder blades, tracing them lightly. When he backed away suddenly, I felt a twinge in my heart at the loss of contact.

“We should get going, we wouldn’t want to be late.”

“Yes. Of course.”

We left and walked in silence, staying at least six inches apart at any given time. There was no fanfare when we arrived this time, the atmosphere in the massive suite darker and more sultry than the last event. Topaz spotted us and guided us to the bar, ordering us drinks.

I looked questioningly up at Loki, forgetting my petty attitude I had adopted in place of the fear of how the alcohol would affect me. He slipped his arm around my waist comfortably and commented, “The Lady doesn’t drink, I will take mine as a double.”

“If that’s what you want.” Topaz reordered the drink, and I was saved.

_Why does he have to be a goddamn knight in shining armor when I’m mad at him?_

We walked around the party, and I was grateful for the low heels. For once I didn’t need his help standing in public, though he kept his arm around me all the same. I missed his touch, I didn’t realize how much until just then. He had cut himself off from me and my body was craving him. _Calm down girl, you’re not a cat in heat!_

After quite a while of mingling, Topaz found us again and directed us to a floor-to-ceiling curtain that hid a room lined with a lime green couch that surrounded a low table. It looked like one of those VIP areas of a fancy night club. In the room was the Grand Master, who stood to greet us.

“My dears, my dears, come in, come in! I’m so excited you’re finally here! This’ll just be fantastic.” he gestured for us to sit and we complied, Loki sitting between the Grand Master and I.

“How kind it was that you invited us again to one of your incredible parties.” Loki had his fake smile plastered on once again. It was eerie how dissimilar it was from his natural smile.

“Yes, yes. Well of course I couldn’t leave my pet project out of the festivities.” On that note, one of the golden girls, blanche probably, entered with a tray of fantastical looking drinks. They all had pink flames flickering a couple inches above the top of the glasses, the liquid swirling on its own with what looked like flakes of different metals floating amongst the turquoise liquor.

“Wonderful timing Teil. Let’s celebrate!”

Loki put on his most convincing smile yet, “Grand Master, if it’s not too bold of me to say, I would prefer if the Lady didn’t drink. She doesn’t hold her alcohol well and I can’t have her embarrassing me in public.”

“Nonsense! We’ll keep a good eye on her.” He winked at me when he said ‘eye’. _Cringing this early in the conversation, not a good sign._ He lifted a drink and handed it to me. He stared at me intently; I took a sip as was expected of me and felt the warmth of the alcohol spread from my throat outward. “Perfect!”

Loki took a sip from his own drink, keeping his arm around my waist. The Grand Master and Loki talked for quite a while, discussing business and gossip while I tuned in and out. Every once in a while the Grand Master would make a comment about my drink and I would take an appeasing sip before he returned his attention to Loki.

After about thirty minutes of this routine, I started to feel odd. My skin was much warmer than usual, and more sensitive. I could feel the slightest change in air circulation, causing goosebumps to form on my exposed arms. On my back, Loki’s fingers started to draw circles absentmindedly. I looked up at him and he took no notice of me, instead maintaining conversation with the Grand Master. _Does he know he’s even doing it? Is it just me or is his breathing heavier than usual?_

My thoughts were cut off by the Grand Master, who chose just then to bring me into the conversation, “And, My Dear. How are you finding you accommodations?”

Words were hard to muster, leaving me with a simple, “Good.”

“And the young prince is satisfactory?” he raised his eyebrows suggestively.

Loki’s hand on my back ceased its circles and tensed.

Mustering all the focus I had I replied, “Oh, yes Grand Master. Just perfect.”

“Well the doctor here, in my opinion a total quack but Topaz won’t let me melt him, has taken me out of commission and I am feeling the needs rise in me as the days go on.”

“I’m sorry your excellency, ‘needs’?”

“Yes, apparently I contracted an unfortunate virus from a Tekarian and am unable to host any of my orgies for two weeks.”

I nearly spit the sip I had taken of my drink out, swallowing it with great pains at the image of the Grand Master in an orgy.

“As such I have to rely on living vicariously through others such as yourselves.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t understand Grand Master.” His hand was still tense against my back.

“To put it plainly: I want to see you two kiss again. I know manufactured lust isn’t as palpable as the natural stuff so I laced your drinks with a little helper.”

“You drugged us?” For the first time I had experienced, Loki sounded angry in conversation with the Grand Master

“Only a bit, darling. A little nudge if you will. Now, let’s get to kissing.” He had never looked so unnervingly creepy before, leaning toward us over the low table.

After taking a deep breath, Loki leaned his head down and connected his lips to mine. Just as before, I melted into him. He kept it reigned in, his mouth closed and moving lightly against mine.

“No, no, no. I need real fire from you!” Loki pulled away and closed his eyes, like he was trying to maintain control, “My dear, why not straddle the man. Take control, and all that.”

Loki’s eyes shot open and I saw them darken with desire. I did as the Grand Master asked, trying to keep my body back from Loki’s as well as I could. Placing my hands on either side of his face, I went in for the kiss. Loki kept his hand spread on the back of the couch, grasping the fabric as if it was the only thing keeping him on alive.

“That’s no good, hold her prince. Hold her to you. Accept her.”

As if that was the permission he was waiting for, Loki’s arms circled around my waist, pulling me flush against him. I placed my elbows on either side of his head hugging him closer to me.

“Yes, yes. That’s it!”

I barely heard him, my body tuning out anything that wasn’t Loki. He broke our kiss, trailing wet kissing along my jaw line and up to my ear. He sucked in my ear lobe, causing me to gasp audibly. Through the fog of lust, I heard myself whisper, “Loki, what are we doing?” _Shut up me! This is incredible, don’t ruin it!_

He stopped his attentions on my ear and tensed. “We need to get out of here, now.” he whispered back, nearly inaudibly.

Without warning, Loki stood with my legs now wrapped around his waist. Speaking to the grandmaster he announced, “I apologize for the abruptness, we need to go back to our quarters. I hope we have satisfied enough of your voyeuristic nature to allow our departure.”

_Even high as fuck he can still maintain a masterful control over language. How fucking hot is that?_

“Oh please do, please do.”

Loki gracefully moved towards the curtain and beyond, me still held in his arms.

“Loki—”

“Not now.” he cut me off, strain evident in his voice. _I know I must weigh a ton, if he would just put me down I could walk. But could I, really? In this state?_

We made it back to the flat in record time, Loki slamming the door behind us and then me against the closed door. We stood like that for a few minutes, his breathing heavy.

“You can put be down if you’d like.” I breathed weakly.

“Not yet. Give me a moment.” He laid his head in the crook of my neck, his breath tickling my collarbone deliciously. “This isn’t good,” he spoke into my neck, “it really isn’t good. I don’t know if I have the strength.”

_Strength?_ “Strength to what”

He lifted his head, connecting to my eyes and said, “The strength to stop myself.” A pleasant fire began to burn in my lower abdomen. “I need you to tell me ‘no’. I need you to tell me ‘not to go any farther’. I don’t want to do this to you again.”

“What if I don’t what you to stop?” I couldn’t believe the words came out of my mouth. _You go you little vixen you!_

“You are not in your right mind. This is a terrible idea.” He made to put me down so I grabbed his head and pulled him in for a kiss.

“No. We might have some crazy drug coursing through our veins, but I wanted this before tonight. I understand that I repulse you, but just for tonight. Please, just for tonight.”

“How could you ever repulse me? You are the goddess I have been waiting for.”

With that his lips descended on mine with a furious speed. He pressed his body hard against mine, and I could feel his muscles rippling under the suit. I desperately wanted to feel those muscles under my fingers, to dig my fingers in them and prove that this was real, that this was the man I had been craving.

A sudden change in position made me gasp into his mouth; he had adjusted me so that he could carry me towards his bed room. _You take me wherever you want to go as long as I can keep touching you._

Along the short walk _,_ his hands slid up my back before dragging the zipper of my dress back down with them. He abruptly released me, causing a moment of panic before a soft landing on his bed. He stood above me still, slowly removing his jacket, and shirt. Once divested of the offending clothes he reached forward and dragged the dress off of me.

We stayed like that, taking each other in. _I didn’t prepare myself for this._ Sure I had imagined him shirtless before, but this was a completely different level. His lithe build was perfectly suited to his frame, each muscle clearly defined. _Is a person allowed to be this attractive?_ Staring at his perfection, my flaws seemed to glow in my mind and I made to cover myself but his hands were on mine, pinning them on either side of my head.

“Don’t you dare.” A playful grin played on his face as he dipped down to lick languorously up my neck, stopping at my ear to continue, “I plan to see all of you tonight, there will be nowhere to hide.” He accented this thought by slipping in between my legs, forcing them apart. I decided in that moment to give myself over to him entirely; if there was one person in the galaxy I trusted, it was him.

His mouth’s ministrations on my neck were sending me into fever, burning where he touched. His skin remained cool, an unexpected sensation that only enhanced the pleasure he was giving me. Once he was sure that I wouldn’t make to cover myself again, he released my hands, placing his hands back on my body where they belonged. He made short work of my bra and panties, leaving me completely naked and at his mercy.

“Unfair.” I croaked out.

His attentions still on my neck, he murmured in between kisses, “What was that, love?”

“It’s unfair.”

“What’s unfair?”

“You’re still wearing clothes.”

I felt him smirk against my neck before he raised his head and pierced his eyes into mine, “How right you are. Ever so thoughtless of me.”

He backed off the bed, and I inwardly cursed myself for being the reason he was no longer touching me. That inner tirade was quashed when he undid the belt and his trousers slipped to the floor. _Damn, son! A Goddamn gift to womankind is what that is._ His expression turned roguish as he descended once again.

Biting playfully on my ear, he teased “Like what you see?”

Surprising both of us, I flipped us so I was now straddling him, pinning his hands above his head, “Let me show you how much.” _When did you turn into such a sexual beast? I love it!_

I kissed my way slowly down his chest while I relished in the obvious force of will it was taking Loki to remain still. I had read the naughty sections of magazines, scoffing at the ridiculous advice that was printed, _but it couldn’t_ _all be wrong right? Let’s test one._ As I was traveling south, I shot my eyes up at him through my eyelashes and caught his gaze. A twitch against my belly indicated that it was successful. _Ok, score one to Cosmo._ When I finally arrived at my destination I was less confident as to what to do next, but I didn’t want to let him know.

His member was at full attention, and when I say full I mean it. _A goddamn gift._ I wrapped my hands around the base and tentatively ran my tongue along the prominent vein running along the underside.

“Oh, good god,” Loki moaned while balling his fists into the sheets. 

I continued my attentions, taking my time and enjoying the quiet groans I was eliciting. After few moments, another tip popped into my mind and I took as much of him into my mouth as I could and then hummed. Loki’s hips jerked unexpectedly, forcing more of him into my mouth than I was ready to take making me gag with a hissed “fuck!” from Loki.

I sat up and he followed, asking if I was alright. I grimaced and replied, “It was my fault for trying something so stupid, I’m sorry.”

He placed his hand under my chin and lifted it, forcing me to meet his eyes, “it was incredible. Where did you lean that?”

I bit my lip and smiled seductively, grateful that I hadn’t ruined everything, “A girl has her secrets.” _Another point to Cosmo, who would’ve guessed?_

“My turn then.” Without warning, he tossed me onto the pillows of the bed and positioned myself between my legs. 

“Wait, no, you don’t have t—” he cut off my words with a flick of his tongue.

The drug in my system mixed with the skill of his tongue and fingers made me see stars in what felt like seconds. The muscles in my legs continued with minute spasms while he slid back up, pulling me to his chest. He kissed along my neck as he waited for my body to settle. I could still feel his member hard against my hip, but he remained gentle until the spasms dissipated.

I spun in his arms, gazing up at this incredible god that I had all to myself. _For now, at least._ The thought must have caused me to frown because Loki asked if everything was alright.

“Oh, yes. Of course.”

He didn’t seem completely happy with my answer but he didn’t push it. I decided the best way to change the subject was to move the night forward.

I slid my hand up his stomach, feeling the muscles react to my touch. I kept my touch light, teasing him. It did the trick; he pushed me back onto my back and covered my body in his. His kiss was insistent and fierce. He pulled back and the unspoken question hung as I felt him near my entrance. A small nod was all he needed and he pushed forward.

It had been a while since I had been with anyone so the sudden invasion was shocking. It was like every aspect of myself was filled by him; any sense that I had drowned in the very thought of him. After allowing my body to adjust to him, he began to move.

We found a rhythm together, a painful sweetness building between us. I could feel myself getting close to the edge when he whispered hoarsely in my ear, “Say my name.”

My eyes were past the point of seeing anything but stars, but I moaned out, “Loki.”

“Again.”

“Loki. I’m—I’m…”

“Yes, my love?”

“I’m almost—”

“Wren!”

“Loki!”

We collapsed together, a tangle of limbs. The drug must have been sweated out of us because the all-consuming desire was dissipating, instead being replaced with exhaustion. I allowed myself to drift off and sleep to take hold of me.

I awoke what must have been only a couple hours later because the view outside his window was still dark. I was trying to figure out what had woken me when I noticed the distinct lack of warmth; Loki wasn’t lying next to me, instead sitting with his feet off the bed and his head in his hands. I sat up and reached a cautious hand out to meet his back. He started at the touch and stood, still not facing me.

“Is everything ok?”

“No. I did exactly what I said I wouldn’t do. This should never have happened.”

It felt like searing daggers had just pierced my chest. _He regrets everything. What a fucking fool am I, thinking this meant something._

“I’m sorry. It’s my fault that last night happened. I pushed you into doing something you clearly didn’t want to do. I’ll go.” I made to get up when he finally turned to face me, a weird fire in his eyes.

“You pushed _me_? I was the one who took advantage of you, hopped up on some powerful drug that rendered you unable to make any clear decisions I—”

“I wasn’t some innocent and helpless faun at the mercy of the jaguar, Loki. I was a willing participant and if you can’t come to terms with that then I should just go.”

I angrily slid off the bed and started stomping towards the door when he caught my hand.

“Willing? You wanted this?”

“Yes I did. Even after you ignored me for a fucking week like a jackass.” The anger started to bubble over inside me, “You kissed me then left me hanging in the freezing wind, not even showing your face like the thought of being around me was so goddamn—”

He cut me off, pulling me into a kiss. _Why does he have to be such a good kisser?_

After a moment he pulled back and looked me in the eyes, “I’m sorry. My actions this week have been appalling.”

“They really were. Why did you act like that?”

“I was ashamed. I allowed my desire for you to cloud my judgement and I took advantage of you.”

“The Grand Master forced us to kiss, you didn’t.”

“There was no one watching when I kissed you in the shuttle bay. My body craved you and I gave in, and lied.”

“Well that was sneaky, but nothing to become a massive dick about.” I smacked him on his bare chest, eliciting a small hiss. “So, how about we go back to bed. I can honestly barely stand right now.”

“If that is what the lady wants.” He lifted me princess style and carried me back to the bed, putting me down gently before sliding in after.

The second time I awoke was infinitely more pleasant than the last, this time caged by Loki’s strong arms. He was still sound asleep, but nature was calling and I tried to slip as smoothly out of his embrace as was possible in my state.

Loki’s bathroom was connected to his bedroom, just the the right of his closet from which I found one of his long tunics to pull on. The image reflected in the bathroom mirror was not as bad as I had imagined; the make up the the magic wand put on my face had stayed in place and not smudged at all, but my hair on the other hand was a wild tangle. I started to work on it when I heard Loki’s panicked voice calling my name from what seemed to be the living room.

I walked out there as quickly as my weak legs could muster to see a still very naked Loki frantically searching the room. When his eyes found me, he collapsed onto the nearest chair and ran a hand through his mop of raven tresses.

“What’s the problem pal?”

“I thought you had left; I couldn’t find you anywhere.”

“Didn’t think to check the bathroom?”

His face scrunched in embarrassment, “That would have been an excellent first place to look.”

“You went with?”

He paused and looked away blushing slightly, “Under the bed.”

I walked over and sat on his knee, “I can promise you that I will never hide from you under the bed.”

“I couldn’t find you and then I started thinking, ‘what if he came and took you what would I do? What could I do?’”

“You think he might do that?” Fear started to bubble in my chest.

“I wouldn’t put anything past him.” His face became deadly serious and he grasped my hands in his saying, “I need to get you off this planet.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the long break! I started a full-time job and Graduate school, things were hectic!

Loki didn’t mention getting me off the planet for the next couple weeks. I barely saw him enough to even talk to him anyway. He would be gone the whole day, come home late, and go straight to bed. His bed. Without me.

At first, I thought things would change between us for the better. Instead, it got so much worse. The moments we were in the flat together were fleeting and icy, Loki ignoring my existence entirely.

_Well, guess that is that. He changed his mind; got what he wanted and obviously doesn’t want it again. But is that true?_ Shaking my head to clear the argument out, I looked around the main living space. It was littered with a multitude of flower arrangements, the most recent that was delivered just an hour ago with flowers that glowed brightly as if plugged into a power source.

Amongst the flowers, there were more books that Loki had left there for her, many of which she had never read. These books had become her company in his absence.

_He didn’t change his mind. He’s just busy. Presents don’t mean shit, they are poor replacements for actual affection. Shut up! Then why hasn’t he tried to kiss you? Touch you? Fuck you?_

“Fuck!” I stood and threw the book I had been mindlessly staring at. A couple of pages fell out as it hit the far wall and I winced. It was a collection of short stories written by Flannery O’Connor. _Sorry Flan, you didn’t deserve that. And you’re right: a good man_ is _hard to find._

I placed the pages carefully back in the tome and laid it back on the center table. Tears threatened to fall again for the second time today. It’s become an everyday experience. The causes vary; loneliness, anger, abandonment, self-hate, Loki-hate, longing. Today was helplessness. The threat came to fruition, spilling silently down my cheeks while I stared unseeing at the book in my hands. There was nothing I could do to change my situation. I’m pretty sure that there are layers to my status that I’m not even aware of. _Can Loki do anything? Does he still want to?_

_Great thought dummy, now you’re crying even more._ The sobs that shook my body filled the space, bouncing back on me from every angle. I was falling into a hole of despair I did not notice the door opening until Loki’s arms surrounded me and lifted me off the floor, carrying me princess style into his room. I clung to his neck, soaking in his heat and scent.

The sobs were still coming and I was fighting to control my breathing. Instead of speaking, I pulled him onto the bed with me curling against his chest. He let me, his hands running up and down my spine until the tears stopped and my breathing calmed.

Pulling back, his worried eyes scanned my face and his thumbs ran along my cheeks sweeping tears away. _The ones that didn’t soak through his shirt; tears and snot._ The blush crept up my neck and took over my entire face making me feel that any remaining tears would evaporate into steam. The embarrassment that was coursing through my veins was almost debilitating. I tried pushing him away but he held strong and said a simple commanding, “No.”

Surrendering to his strength, I fell back into him.

“Are you going to tell me what upset you?” His voice rumbled from his chest and through me.

“Do you actually care?” The words were quiet, but I shocked myself with the venom dripping from them.

He reached between us, lifting my chin and forcing me to look up at him.

“Why would you question if I care?” The fire blazing behind his eyes was startling.

“You have to be kidding me!” this time when I pushed him away, he let me. I swung my legs over the side of the bed and started pacing the length of the bed. Loki remained on the bed, propped up on his elbow with a dumbstruck look on his beautiful face. _Don’t get distracted, you’re pissed!_

“You really don’t know why I would be upset?” My voice was approaching the vocal range only heard by dogs, but I powered on, “You fuck me and promise me everything, then you abandon me. You treat me like I no longer exist!”

He stood hastily up then, the bed now between us, “That is not what happened, I was bus—“

“You were busy? Seriously? That is your great fucking excuse for making me feel like nothing? Making me feel unwanted and abandoned?”

“That was never my intention. I promise you”

“Oh, you promise? Promises are just pretty words until actions prove them to be truth.”

“Damnit, Wren! I’m doing everything I can right now, can’t you see that?” his eyes were blazing again.

“I can only see these four walls,” I narrowed my eyes, pinning him to the spot, “It’s all I’m _Permitted_ to see.” My body was vibrating either with what I first thought was anger, but what started to transition to anguish.

The fire in his eyes dimmed, replaced with something softer. He slowly moved around the bed until he was standing right in front of me. Like his walk over, every move he made was deliberate as if afraid to set me off. His hands gently grasped my upper arms and pulled me into him.

The exhaustion from my outburst hit me all at once and my legs gave out. As if he had expected it, he caught me around the waist and guided me towards the bed again. I let him, melting into the soft sheets. He tucked me in and made to leave the room.

“Please?” the word wasn’t much more than a whisper, but it made him pause at the door, “Please stay?” I hated how pathetic it sounded.

He walked back over to the bed and lent over, pressing his lips to my neck, “I have one more thing to finish before I can retire, but I _promise_ I will come back to you.”

He walked out, bathing me in darkness with his retreat.

_Well, at least he knows now. You looked batshit crazy and he probably regrets ever seeing or touching you, but at least he knows._

I groaned into his pillow. It smelled so much of him that it began calming my rapidly beating heart and I was asleep before my mind could talk me any closer to the ledge.

I woke up sometime later to the bed moving. Panic struck me first until I felt Loki’s arms wrapping around me for the third time this night. He pulled me against him so his chest was to my back, and his mouth was against my ear.

“I’m sorry.” He nuzzled deeper into my neck.

“It’s alright,” I dismissed, too tired now to fight.

“No. It’s not. I abandoned you these last couple weeks. I didn’t see it like that because I was working towards our goal, but I left you alone and without any knowledge of what I was doing.” His hand reached around to my chin and tilted it so I could see his face with the subtle morning light filtering through the gauzy curtains. He continued, “I will move the planets to keep you safe. There is nothing that will stop me.”

He punctuated this statement with a soft kiss to my lips before releasing my chin and settling back against my neck.

_Fucking told ya so._

 

 

 


End file.
